No celebrations last night. Was not in the mood. I feel like an utter failure. You look back on the past year, and you can't find a single day where you've done something great, where you've achieved something. 365 days of simply existing. Might as well croak and die.
I told Akhil 'trust me', and he did, and I let him down. How can I forgive myself, for relying on others, thinking they give a shit. Have I lost a friend in him now that he knows he can't rely on me like that. If only I had not given a specific time. If only I had not relied blindly on someone else to come through, then I wouldn't be feeling this shitty. Starting a new year feeling like a piece of shit.
